Another happened last week.
It was the spring "Pops" concert at my kids high school, actually on the way home.
I always have enjoyed music and this concert was no exception. It makes me feel young again and think back to my days in my high school band. Sure, it may have not been a popular thing in my school to be part of the band, choir got more respect, but I am not gifted with voice. I was gifted with talent as a percussionist. I carried that gift with me into college (the first time) and I played for a small town community band for a number of years, so going back to concerts of my kids feels like a homecoming.
As I left the concert, I was feeling youthful and turned up the volume on my local classic rock station as I was leaving town. I am a closet singer in my truck, when nobody is around, and was belting out the tunes as I was driving.
Suddenly the lyrics of one song hit me. Lyrics I have heard many times, yet this time, they struck me deep to my core:
|"Under the Bridge"- Red Hot Chili Peppers|
It also reminded how far I have come since that time. No longer am I struggling like I was. I have accomplished so much, overcame so many barriers, been blessed beyond what I deserve. Meniere's has left me alone, for the most part. I no longer live in fear of attacks, but rather they are part of my history, part of who I am, but not controlling me.
I, for the first time in nearly 4 years, feel alive again. I feel intelligent, yet not completely whole. I feel confident, yet cautious. I feel wanted in my career, sought after even.
As an exercise for something I was pursuing, I was asked to list my skills and training and the list was long and empowering. Most of it in the last 4 years.
It was this realization that flooded me when I heard these lyrics.
It was at this point that I realized that this WAS my theme song, and I DON'T ever want to feel like I did back then.
'til next time
Just a guy trying to live with an invisible, potentially debilitating illness